1 Down 2 To Go

One semester completed! It definitely wasn't easy and I did hit a few bumps here and there that really upset me but I was able to get past that and make it through. I am so thankful that I was able to do so well this semester. My sister was so proud of me that she paid for me to have a massage which was fantastic! They gave us a lot of homework to do over the break though :( I am looking forward to going home for the holidays! I really can't wait until Jordan opens her Christmas gifts cause I think she is really going to love them! Christmas is my favorite! 

Almost Through It

Well this semester is coming to a quick end. I MADE IT!!! I have 3 final exams left and I am not worried about them at all. I am so excited that I have made it this far and I really need a break! I found out a few days ago that over New Years I will be going to Florida with Jordan to see our friend get married and I am so excited. I have never been to that side of the US and can't wait. It might be a long drive but I think it will be so much fun! Right now all I have to worry about is what I am going to buy the kids for Christmas presents.

Update

I am so excited! The semester is almost over and for the first time I feel completely confident that I am going to survive the semester! We start clinicals soon and I just can't stop smiling. It's really going to happen this time and the hard work has paid off!! 4 more weeks!! I can do it! I love my job and love that I am this much closer to the life I have dreamed of having!

Busy Busy Busy

I guess my thinking of being able to update this pretty well everyday was not very good thinking. I am busy all the time and the extra time that I do have, I try to catch up on some sleep. I wake up everyday at about 5am so that I can get some studying in before school and then I get ready and go to school early and study some more there. After I go to school all day, I come home, rest about an hour (if I can) and get right back to studying until it is time for bed again. Its all going to pay off in the end though because I am doing pretty well in my classes. I just have to make sure to stay on top of everything. It is when I get behind that I start messing everything up. Well its almost that time for me to leave the house early so that I can get to the school and focus in my car without any distractions like computers or televisions or dogs. One of these days I will catch up on this thing but for now just know this:


God is definitely working in me. He has brought me great friends and I am doing my very best to stay on task. I started my new job and am enjoying it and although I feel school will never end, I keep reminding myself why I am there and it pushes me forward. Keep me in your prayers. Pray that I might have the strength and focus to stay on task and press on through every obstacle they throw at me. 

Update

Well, I thought I would keep up with this blog a lot better but things have gotten so busy that I never really get on the computer anymore except to check my grades, which I do on my phone most of the time. It has been a long past few weeks. They definitely like to keep us busy. It feels like we have a big test to study for every single day. I surprise myself with how little TV I am watching, but I tend to use Friday afternoons to catch up on all the shows I have missed during the week. I am hoping that this weekend I can use my time wisely and study for my exams as well as get ahead on my notecards and drug cards. I haven't done very good at keeping up with the drug cards and they are due on the 7th, eek! This morning my stomach is just in knots because I am so nervous about the two tests that I have today. I know that I know the information pretty well but I want to make sure to do good. Right now I have a high B in A&P and if I can make an A on this exam today and an A on my final then my teacher thinks I can get my A back in the class but at this point, I am very happy with a B. I have 2 final exams next week and 3 tests on top of that. Its going to keep me very busy. Tomorrow morning however, I start my new job at the hospital. I am only going to really be working one day a week but it will be good experience and it will get my foot in the door for sure. I am pretty excited about it but nervous as well. Well I have to go look over my stuff for my test today but I wanted to catch everyone up on what is going on with me. I pray that God will help me to recall of the information that I have studied and that he will keep me calm and focused on what is important. 

To a New Beginning

Today is my last day working at the hotel. I think they are keeping me on staff so that I can help out if I ever want to or if they ever need me but its pretty much my last day. I am excited about that! I got the new job working at the hospital and I get to make my own schedule. Its going to be a great experience, good money, and will help me be more successful in the way that I want to be.

Today is also a day that I am excited about because my sister and her family are here. I am so ready to go and spend time with them. I really miss them a lot. It really is difficult going from seeing them everyday to seeing them ever once in a while. The kids are growing up way to fast but luckily they still love me! Kyler is still "Becca's Boy" and Brynlee is just too darn cute. Last night she was telling me who they were going to be for Halloween but she couldn't tell me without changing her accent to be like theirs. She said "Kyler is going to be Ron and I am going to be Hermione. Ethan is going to be Harry Potter". She then proceeded to tell me things that Hermione would say like "Its not leviosA but leviOsa. Lengardium Leviosa!" It was so stinking cute! Made me grin from ear to ear! I told Summer that she needs to be Professor McGonagle. It just fits perfectly. I asked Kyler about being Ron and they told me that they play "squidditch" on the trampoline and he said Gryffindor wrong too but I don't remember the exact wording he used. It was just too cute. Put me in the best mood and really made me miss being around them all of the time. I just wish they didn't live in Carlsbad so that I could be around them. I think that both of my sisters, their families, and I all need to move to the same place so that we can be around each other all the time.

Well off to working now!

Special Day

About 16 years ago, I went to church camp in Sacramento NM. Little did I know back then, that I would be making a friend who would last a lifetime. Friendships come and go, but nothing has ever been able to get in the way of this one. Today is that very special friends birthday and I want to tell her how much she means to me. 


Friend, 
First of all, I want you to know that I miss you so much. You have always been there for me and are one of my biggest inspirations. You have always inspired me to be a better person and a better christian. We have shared a lot together. We have had our share of tears and more laughs than anyone can count. Wether it be singing at the top of our lungs in the car, spending quality time at the creek, piling up a mound of change on a table for a tip, or talking about boys, spending time with you was always very special to me. I wish that I could spend more time with you, but for some reason you felt the need to move across the US from me :( I thought you had learned your lesson when you moved across the world twice but I guess not. :) LOL. You are such an amazing woman and I am so excited for you and what is to come very shortly. You are going to be an amazing mother and that baby is so lucky to have such wonderful parents. I hope that your special day today is one that you will always remember. I want you to never forget how much of an impression you have made in my life and especially never forget how much I love you! I hope to talk to you soon! For now, I will just leave you with these small quotes to make you smile:
- Her name is Noel, I had a dream about her, she rings my bell, got gym class in heaven now you know how she rocks, in keds and tube socks...
- Woke up in the morning, put on some new plastic gloves, served some reheated salsbury steak, with a little slice of love. Got no clue what the chicken pot pie is made of... 
- Thumbs up, elbows back, knees bent, knees together, bum out, head back, tounge out :) 


I love you friend! 

Surprise!

So it turns out that the test I thought I completely bombed yesterday was the exact opposite! I got an A. Surprise!!! I am in such a better mood today than I was yesterday. I was so stressed about getting a bad grade and now that stress can be completely gone! It was pretty funny, today we went to the Baptist Student Ministry lunch (because its $1) and we were all sitting around talking about how she must not have graded them right. And I mentioned that I keep a blog about school and one of the girls said "I wanna read it... wait, you probably talk crap about us on there huh?!" So this is me talking crap about them LOL. Yeah right! I really like the friends I have made in this program and I don't think that I would be successful without them. Tonight 2 of them are coming over for a new smaller study group and I am going to cook them dinner. We have a test tomorrow and since it is only over one chapter, it will be either really easy or really hard. I just want to make sure that I am prepared either way! Bring it on ANS, I am ready for you! 

The Climb

Yesterday was really hard for me. I went into a test feeling completely unprepared even though I did study and I studied with my study group. I just felt completely lost in the material and it all just made me want to cry. I came out of the testing room and found everyone talking about how that test was so hard. They all felt that if they would take the first part of the test away they would have done better. Luckily I wasn't alone in my feelings. I hate coming out of a test feeling that way. 

I know its going to sound very cheesy but I was talking to one of the girls in my class because she commented on the paper that I have printed off on pretty paper in my binder. Its the words to Francesca Battistelli's Free to be Me because I just feel that the lyrics pretty well describe me. After yesterday though, I realize that the words to Miley Cyrus' song The Climb really described the journey that I am on right now and we were talking about how the lyrics were so true to all of us right now. I just decided that I really wanted to share them with you so I want you to really read the words and think about it. Don't just be like "eh, I have heard that song and I don't like Miley Cyrus". Really read the words. 

"The Climb"

I can almost see it.
That dream I'm dreaming, but
There's a voice inside my head saying
You'll never reach it
Every step I'm takin'
Every move I make
Feels lost with no direction,
My faith is shakin'
But I gotta keep tryin'
Gotta keep my head held high

There's always gonna be another mountain
I'm always gonna wanna make it move
Always gonna be an uphill battle
Sometimes I'm gonna have to lose
Ain't about how fast I get there
Ain't about what's waitin' on the other side
It's the climb

The struggles I'm facing
The chances I'm taking
Sometimes might knock me down, but
No I'm not breaking
I may not know it, but
These are the moments that
I'm gonna remember most
I've just gotta keep goin', and
I gotta be strong
Just keep pushing on, cause

There's always gonna be another mountain
I'm always gonna wanna make it move
Always gonna be an uphill battle
Sometimes I'm gonna have to lose
Ain't about how fast I get there
Ain't about what's waitin' on the other side
It's the climb

There's always gonna be another mountain
I'm always gonna wanna make it move
Always gonna be an uphill battle
Sometimes I'm gonna have to lose
Ain't about how fast I get there
Ain't about what's waitin' on the other side
It's the climb

Keep on movin'
Keep climbin'
Keep the faith baby
It's all about, it's all about
The climb
Keep the faith, keep your faith, woah 

Butterflies in my Stomach

Well I got the word today that I will be able to quit my job. When I got to work today, none of the managers were here so I typed up a very professional and nice letter explaining that I am putting in my 2 weeks notice and why I am leaving. It makes me so nervous to quit. I like the people at my job and I don't want to hurt any of their feelings but making this decision is going to be so much better for me in the long run. I just wish it were easier to do. I wish I could do it and not care what anyone else thinks about it.

So work tonight and tomorrow and then I am in for a few nights of studying and off to begin week 2 of school. Its crazy because there are already people wanting to quit the program and it is only week one. I am not going to be one of those people! I am going to be successful this go round and I am not going to let anything get in my way!

Week 1 Completed!

Well, they don't go easy on you the first week, thats for sure. I however, have come out on top of this week. I did well on all 3 tests we have had this week and have done well on all of the quizzes as well. I have like 3 more tests next week as well... its going to be crazy! I looked ahead at our schedule and noticed that we pretty well have 3 tests a week for most of the semester. We formed a study group last night and it really helped out a lot. I think this is the first time I have every walked away from those two kinds of tests feeling very confident in myself and how I did. 


I am hoping that I will be able to stop working soon so that I can really focus on school and only school. I'm just waiting on one thing to get worked out, which I really pray that it will, and then I can take that leap of faith. I am so determined and motivated to do well this year! 


On the church side, I really have found that I fit into this crossover group and am making some good friends. I look forward to getting to know them better and growing closer to them. So to end off this entry, life is good right now. Sleep deprived? A little yes. Stressed? A little yes, which having to work all weekend is making it worse. 

And So It Begins

Yesterday was the first day of classes. We spent most of the morning getting oriented with the lab and simulation center. The afternoon was spent in lecture that began with our first day's exam. I am pretty sure I aced that exam though. They have us in a math class that my 6 year old niece could do very easily and luckily it only lasts one hour. I haven't felt much pressure yet, thank goodness, but I know that it is coming. I have 2 exams this coming Friday that I have to go prepare for but just wanted to check in. 

The Cats out of the Bag

Oh where to even begin. Well I guess I can start with the fact that I had a car wreck last month. I hit a deer (dumb dumb deer) and nearly totaled my car. Well I finally got it back a few weeks ago from "being repaired" and yet I find there is still damage that was never even touched. I called my dad and we got it worked out where I don't have to take my car to New Mexico to get it fixed. I will try to take it up there tomorrow to see how long it will take to repair.
With school starting this coming Monday, I have a lot of stuff I need to do. I have a test on Monday and one on Friday that I need to be studying for as well as I need to go to the bookstore and buy a few more things they are requiring me to have. This is one expensive program for being so cheap in tuition. It will be worth it all in the end though.
The cat is officially out of the bag on school. Everyone in my family knows now and I don't have to try and hide it anymore. I really am not sure how my dad found out but oh well. I think it will be better that he knows because I am not good at hiding it. I'm getting very anxious about school! Bring it on!!!
Also, I went to the gym last night with Richelle and luckily I haven't felt too sore today but I probably will feel it tonight when I go to the gym again when I get off of work.
The best thing that has happened to me lately is church. I have found a place I really feel like I could belong. I am really enjoying the crossover class and their small groups. It feels so good to have a place that I can go, be myself, and feel like I belong there. We studied this last week about what it truly means to be a disciple and what it meant in Jesus' time to be a Rhabbi and a disciple. Man, I want to be a true disciple. I want to have the dust of my Rhabbi's feet all over me. Its time to stop making excuses and start living the life I am called to live. I am called to be a disciple to Jesus Christ. He has told me "Come, follow me. Do what I do." and its time for me to answer that call.

Oriented and Diving Right In

Well orientation was a success. I surpsingly learned quite a bit from one speaker, the rest were pretty lame. I don't know what it is but for some reason I am feeling super confident about this attempt at nursing school and I know I am going to be successful! I felt a little awkward because it seemed everyone seemed to know each other already and were already buddied up and then there were a few like me who were just there. Hopefully that will not last long. I am already having to prepare for a test for the first day of school and another test for the first Friday. I want to make sure I do good so today I made the notecards to study for the first day test and even though I am at work, I am about to start reading my book to prepare for the Friday test.
Speaking of books, I went and bought my books yesterday and holy cow! $1300 later and I still dont even have them all yet. Its going to definitely be a rough year financially. I have to go spend between $120 and $150 on scrubs that are required too. I did however speak with a nursing recruiter for the hospital I want to work for and we have been in contact about me working as an on call CNA while in school that way I can be making some money, and more an hour than I make at the hotel. Hopefully it happens!
I am just at this point of where I am nervous about it all but also super excited and ready to dive on in. I just keep telling myself "yes its going to be a hard year but its only one year and it will be very worth it in the end."

Get Oriented!

So I am standing here at work, impatiently waiting for my shift to be over, and thinking about how I really hope that I can get to sleep tonight when I get home. I have orientation for school all day tomorrow. Here is the funny part. They sent us an email having the schedule on it for everything we are going to be doing tomorrow and they made sure to put in the email that we need to be wearing the right kind of underwear to try on our scrubs... first of all, what is the "right" kind of underwear. I don't want to be trying on any kind of scrubs in front of people. I better be changing in like a bathroom or something. No one needs to see that.

For some reason, I feel my stomach getting in knots about tomorrow though. We are going to have to get our books and they are giving us our first weeks assignments for classes even though we don't technically start for two weeks. I hope that the books aren't too expensive and that maybe I have some of them at home already so that I don't have to buy them again. Tomorrow should definitely be interesting and I will be sure to get on here tomorrow night and tell you all about it. 

One great thing about tomorrow though is that a good friend is coming into  town. He just moved a month or two ago to San Angelo and I haven't seen or talked to him in a while but he will be here tomorrow and we are going to hang out tomorrow night so I am really excited about it. It is always a good time to be around Mr. David Robbins and tomorrow should be no different! 

Bring on tomorrow! Its time to GET ORIENTED! 

This Is the Stuff

My nerves are starting to really get the best of me today. I'm very nervous about everything I have coming up and I'm very frustrating because things just are not going right at all. Then God intervenes and sends me a message through a song. I have to sit back and think... God you are in control and you know what you are doing.... I just wanted to share the lyrics of the song that made me realize today that I don't need to worry and I need to change my whole attitude.

This Is The Stuff- Francesca Battistelli

 

I lost my keys in the great unknown
And call me please 'Cuz I can't find my phone

This is the stuff that drives me crazy
This is the stuff that's getting to me lately
In the middle of my little mess
I forget how big I'm blessed
This is the stuff that gets under my skin
But I gotta trust You know exactly what You're doing
It might not be what I would choose
But this is the stuff You use

45 in a 35
Sirens and fines while I'm running behind
Whoa

This is the stuff that drives me crazy
This is the stuff that's getting to me lately
In the middle of my little mess
I forget how big I'm blessed
This is the stuff that gets under my skin
But I gotta trust You know exactly what You're doing
It might not be what I would choose
But this is the stuff You use

So break me of impatience
Conquer my frustrations
I've got a new appreciation
It's not the end of the world
Oh Oh Oh

This is the stuff that drives me crazy
This is the stuff
Someone save me
In the middle of my little mess
I forget how big I'm blessed
This is the stuff that gets under my skin
And I've gotta trust You know exactly what You're doing
It might not be what I would choose
But this is the stuff You use

Good Morning!

Today has started off great. I guess I was too excited to sleep this morning and I am not really even sure why but I woke up at 7 and couldn't go back to sleep. I finally rolled out of bed and got ready for church. I actually got to go to a bible class today and I actually really liked the class, even though today was about politics and government. They are studying the book of Romans right now and the class is made up of people my age in the same walk of life that I am in. Jordan and I talked about it and we think that we are going to make this our new church home. We feel like we can really get involved at this church and that it can really help us to grow spiritually.
The day before yesterday however, I was not in such a good mood. I recieved a letter on my door saying I had violated my lease for having another dog. Before I got Chloe, I made sure to read through all the paperwork to make sure that I was going to be okay about getting her. Apparently, they say that the pet deposit is per pet and the pet rent is per pet. If that is the case, I don't know what I am going to do because I cannot afford to pay that much money again. I'm still paying on the first pet deposit. It has me stressing out pretty good. And to put the icing on the cake, I got a letter from my financial aid people saying that I wasn't getting as much money in student loans as I had originally been told, and now I am freaking out about how I am going to pay for rent without working. I am enrolled in 9 classes this next semester and am going to have to work extremely hard to maintain the grades they expect you to maintain. Working would be extremely hard to do with all of the workload school is going to be giving me. I am not sure what I am going to do and I don't like not knowing. I am hoping that I can go talk to financial aid in person on Tuesday morning before I have to go to work. If not I will have to go Wednesday or Thursday. I have my root canal on Friday and then probably work the rest of the weekend and have orientation on Tuesday.
I am just ready for everything to get figured out and get everything started. I'm ready for this new life to begin and I just pray that I stay strong through it all!

Birthdays, late nights, and doubts

So yesterday was my 24th birthday. I had so much to do yesterday. First thing, I had to be at work at 6:45 in the morning and I also had to get all of my nursing paperwork in before noon or I would sacrifice my spot in the program. Luckily my boss watched the desk for me so I could get that paperwork turned in. Then they gave me a copy of the classes that I would be taking and it stressed me out even more. 9 classes, 18 hours. Its not like I haven't taken that many hours before, just never that many classes at one time so this year I am really going to have to be organized and plan everything out. After work, I went and put my checks in the bank and paid my rent. I hate doing that. LOL you get your money and 2 seconds later its gone. I took a small nap and headed out to my soccer game. The game went horrible! We could not get a goal to save our lives, and our passes were absolutely horrible. After the game, a lot of us went out to a bar called Chips. We played pool and shuffle board and my friend Richelle bought me a birthday cake. They got me Elmo plates for the cake too. It was quite funny being in a bar with Elmo plates. In the end the waitress loved us because we shared our cake with her :) I haven't stayed out late in so long and I stayed out til about 2 or so last night. It was really hard to get up this morning and I have been so tired all day long. Last night showed me that I am happy I don't stay out like that anymore. It never fails though, nights like last night always get me thinking or Jordan and I have our deepest conversations. I wrote earlier that I wanted to stop being a luke warm Christian and start being a Radical Christian! I want my life to be lived for Him and I want to have no doubts. I am sick of not liking myself and who I am and am ready to make the changes that need to be made. Going to get healthy physically, mentally, and spiritually. Its time to start living for me and start living for HIM. Bring it on world, its on like donkey kong!

New Beginning

I was talking to Jordan last night and she really got me thinking. I love the verse Romans 12:2 but I started realizing how I am not living it. We were talking about how we want to stop living luke warm lives but start living radical ones. In part of our conversation, we were talking about how the world is telling us things that are okay and things we know God says is not okay but with the world telling us it is, sometimes its really hard to feel that its not. We are letting the world conform us and that is exactly what we dont want. I told Jordan that I am interested in trying out a different church and trying to find a bible class since we never go to one at the church we are at now. I want to be more involved in a church and I want to grow. I am ready for school to get started and I really want to either quit my job or tell them that I can only work one day a week so that I can have the opportunities to go to church or a small group. I'm ready to live a radical life! 


I don't wanna be I don't wanna be a casual christian.
I don't wanna live I don't wanna live a luke warm life.
I just wanna light up the night, with your everlasting light.
I don't wanna live a casual christian life. 

A little Homesick

So yesterday I drove home to do some work for the radio station. I forgot how much I love this job! I spent the night with Brynlee and Kyler last night and man do I miss them. They are so funny. They both kept asking Summer if they could sleep with me and they were so worried that we wouldn't have time to play with each other while I was here so they wanted to try and cram it all in the first night. We of course had to play outside in their play house and Brynlee wanted me to be the customer in her restaurant. She made my food out of play dough. She made me mac and cheese, which she literally sculpted, corn dogs, and plastic chicken nuggets. It was so cute! Kyler can't even handle how excited he is that I am here. He doesn't want to go anywhere without me and is just full of energy. It really makes me miss being around them all the time. I know that I can't be around them all the time forever but I wish I could. I would totally do that if it didn't mean moving back to Carlsbad. That is the last thing that I want to do. Lubbock has been good for me. Jordan has helped me grow in so many ways and I am very grateful to have a friend like her. I don't know what I would do without her. She encourages me on a daily basis and pushes me to be the best that I can be. I can't wait to start school at the same time she does so that we can push each other and be successful. Even though I miss home sometimes and the way Brynlee and Kyler light up when I am around (making me feel extremely special and important), its my time to make something of myself. I will be 24 on Monday and not only with I age a year but my whole life is going to change that day. I can't wait to see where life takes me and I know that with great friends, great family, and an even GREATER GOD, my life is going to be a very exciting adventure!

Swollen but good

So Tuesday I had two soccer games. The games were going great and I had scored like 2 or 3 goals. I was after the ball and went right into the wall as my ankle turned. I was so proud cause I didn't shed a tear. Just got up and walked to the side line. Its a bit swollen today and still really sore but I am definitely powering through. Yesterday I took my certification test for my CNA and I passed! Wahoo so today I uploaded my resume to Covenant's website and applied for 2 jobs. Hopefully I get a call about at least one of them. It will pay more than my current job and if I can get it I can work that job on the weekends while I'm in school. Get some experience under my belt, make some good connections, and be able to be doing what I love. I'm so excited and I hope that it works out! 
I also leave on Wednesday to head home and get my car back, work my radio gig, come back Thursday to pick up Jordan and hit the road for Six Flags. I just have this feeling that its going to be a really good week! 

Potty Training Sucks

So I have this super cute puppy and she is so cuddly and lovey but I have one big problem with her. She is not picking up on this potty training thing! She knows that she is not supposed to go in the house because as soon as she does, she runs and hides. I just am having a really hard time getting her not to pee and poop in the house. My room smells now cause of her. Anyone have any suggestions on how to fix the problem?


I have been sitting home all day doing nothing the past few days because I haven't had work and I am bored to death! I can't stand being home all day with nothing to do. I am ready for school to get here so that I can get busy again and have something to do. This Saturday, I have my CNA certification exam. Then I have to hurry and try and get my TB test done. I went in and already had it done but didn't get to get it read because of a last minute need to go to the dentist. Now I have to do it all over again and I have to go get it Monday morning, get it read Wednesday morning and get the paperwork straight to the school. Then from there I get to drive to Artesia to do a few remotes, get back to Lubbock and pick up Jordan than hit the road and go to Dallas. I'm excited about Dallas for sure! Come home and its my birthday :) then work as much as I can before school starts on the 16th. I'm just ready for it to start so bad!!! Its crazy I know but its true. I'm getting very impatient. Jordan and I walk into Wal-Mart and I see all the school supplies and it makes me ever more excited.

Weird Day

So today has been one of those days where I keep thinking about what I want my life to be. I went to church for the first time in a while because work has been preventing that. I was sitting there thinking, man I really miss being able to come here all the time. I was also looking around and seeing how much things are changing and seeing that all of the young people around me were paired off. Now I know that that is the last thing that I should be thinking about while I was at church but for some reason I just kept thinking about it. Why isn't that me? Thats all that was going through my head. Made me want to get on this healthy kick even faster so that I can get the weight off and maybe guys would be more interested in me if I looked that way. That isn't the main reason I want to lose weight but it is a part of it. I figure once I start loving myself and my body then guys might start doing the same thing. I am so ready to find that special someone and start a family of my own. I am so ready to finish school already so that I can start the life I was meant to live. I am just ready for it to be  my turn. As cheezy as that might sound, its true!

Bright Future

Lately, Jordan and I have really been talking about making a big change in our lives. She is waiting for the call telling her that she got into PTA school while I am about to embark on nursing school yet again. We both want a huge change to happen and we are so excited about making the change. We have a big trip coming up in a few weeks that we are so excited about taking. It is a chance to get away and have some fun before we have to come home and begin living the life of the student who never stops studying. After returning from our trip, we plan on giving up cokes, eating healthy, and starting our new diet and exercise plan. If all goes the way we have it mapped out, our goal will be met before December 1st and we can't wait for that to happen. It is going to take a lot of discipline and hard work but that is part of the thrill. The end results will be well worth it. I know I can't wait for this transformation to take place and neither can she. Goodbye old self! I won't miss you!

One Body Many Parts

In 1 Corinthians 12 starting in verse 12, the bible talks about the body being a unit made of many parts. Each part has its own function. In verse 26 it says "If one part suffers, every part suffers with it". The past few days, especially today, I have had this horrible tooth ache. A tooth is so small and seems so insignificant. One tooth shouldn't cause so much pain and shouldn't make the whole body suffer. Yet that is exactly how it feels. One small tooth is causing so much suffering. It hurts and makes it hard to think or sleep. The lack of sleep makes it hard to function and the rest of the body to feel tired. It leaves me not wanting to move or do anything at all.
The body of Christ is just the same. Though we may feel so small and insignificant, our suffering is not insignificant. Today my sister told me that one of her friends passed away. This friend was a young mother of 7 children, one of which was still nursing. The loss came at a huge shock to everyone and it really starts making you appreciate the life you have. I didn't know this friend, but because my sister is hurting, I hurt with her. It goes to show that when one part of the body suffers, the other parts suffer with it.

So Yesterday

I had a really bad day yesterday. I didn't start off with my God time like I have been, I went to lunch with the roommate and the problems just started hitting. $271 later, I was in a completely bad mood and went to try and run it off. Started feeling better after the run and then went to Tuesday night softball league. The game was horrible!!! I can honestly say that no matter how much I like playing softball, this team is not worth playing on. I'm not very good at the losing thing.


I feel like Satan knew that I was starting to build a good relationship with God and that my life was getting better so he decided that when the rain began to fall, it pours and floods. I just hope a day like yesterday never happens again!!!

The Story of your Life

Is this the end?
Or only the beginning?
The second chance
You never thought you'd get

The question is
Will you do something with it
Or spend your days
Lost in your regreat

This is the story of your life
You decide
How the rest is gonna read
This is your chance between the lines
To redefine what kind of legacy you leave
This is the story of your life
And it's a story worth telling

Breathe in deep
Feel your heart still breathing
Let's go see the reason you're alive
Oh, you are here
and love is up to something
So take your fear
and leave it all behind

This is the story of your life
You decide
How the rest is gonna read

This is your chance between the lines
To redefine what kind of legacy you leave
This is the story of your life
And it's a story worth telling

This is the joy
And it's the pain
And all the pages in between
Your finest hour
Your weakest moment
It where you've been
It's where you are
It's where you're going

This is the story of your life
You decide
How the rest is gonna read
This is your chance between the lines
To redefine the kind of legacy you leave
This is the story of your life
Go tell the story of your life
Cause it's a story worth telling
It's worth telling

Is this the end?
Or only the beginning?

Good Morning

Oh Lord I thought the day would never come.
When I could lay my burdens down and walk with you.
This morning as I greet the rising sun, the fondest of my dreams have all come true.
The greatest friend you'll ever find is on the lonely mountaintop
The highest high you'll ever reach is when you kneel to pray to God
The brightest light you'll ever see is when you close your eyes real tight
Oh Lord you are my first love at last I realize
Oh Lord I need a mountain to climb on
Just a quiet place to go and know your there
Oh Lord I need to spend some time with you
Jesus spent the night with you in prayer


Father God
Just for today
Help me walk the narrow way
Help me stand where I might fall
Give me the strength to hear your call
May my steps be worship
May my thoughts be praise
May my words bring honor to your name.


This morning I woke up 30 minutes earlier than planned so that I could spend 30 minutes with God. I read some passages out of my bible and wrote in my prayer journal. I started off my day thinking about God and asking him to give me strength and to help me maintain a good attitude at work. I also asked that he help me shine his light and share his love with the people I encounter. I woke up with these two songs in my head and I found it appropriate. I think that the second song needs to be a prayer I say everyday. I can already tell that by starting my day with God, my day is increasingly better. I plan on ending my day with God, just the way I did last night. I have challenged myself to start and end my day with God. Included in that challenge is to read my bible the whole way through since I have never done that before. I really want to fall in love with my God all over again and I want to lose myself in Him. I am working on changing my lifestyle all the way around. I want a better relationship with God and I am trying to get healthy. I am beginning to work out with a trainer and am going to work towards my goal weight as well as possibly running a marathon. I can't wait to see where God takes me! Its time to start Defying Gravity!

The Song In My Head

http://youtu.be/prDuH01qENc

My Goal

In about a month I will be starting nursing school. My experience with school has not been one that I am proud of and I am trying to prove to myself and my family that I can do this. I haven't told my dad nor my oldest sister that I am even going to start nursing school so that I can keep as much negative energy away from my goal. As far back as I can remember, nursing has been a dream of mine and I am not going to let anyone get in the way of that. 
One day I would love to follow one of the verses that defines me. "... to preach the word of God and heal the sick" Luke 9:2 I feel that God has called me to proclaim his love and his word through nursing and that is what I want to do more than anything. 
I have never been good at sharing my feelings with people and tend to be that person who bottles everything up. I have found that writing things down really helps with my stress and allows me to get my feelings out without having to hurt anyone around me. My goal with this blog is to share my journey of nursing school, finding myself, and striving to be a Godly woman in a world that tells us otherwise. 
One of my main mottos is to Defy Gravity. I got this saying from my favorite musical, Wicked, but I really feel that it defines the way that I want to live my life. To Defy Gravity means to not allow others to determine how you live your life or who you are. In Romans 12:2, we are told to not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will. To me Defying Gravity encourages me to not conform to this world. I am going to make it my mission to write everyday to share my journey and what I encounter through out my journey. May God be glorified in everything that I do and everything that I share.